BPC registered psychotherapist & supervisor, a member of The British Psychotherapy Foundation, and former Clinical Director of South Bucks Counselling (2019-2023). Â
I trained in the NHS at St Barts’ Hospital, and the Homerton Hospital in London. I am a former staff psychotherapist at Nightingale Hospital.
I have 25 years of experience working with people, dealing with depression, low mood, anxiety states, trauma, bereavement, relationship issues, addictions, and emotional instability. I am available via Zoom, FaceTime, or at my consulting room near Oxford. Contact me to arrange a free telephone consultation.Â
Books and Publications



Toby Ingham has written three books. A Guilty Victim, a case study exploring themes of grooming and sexual abuse, written with full client consent, which has been the subject of a 4-page article in The Times Magazine. A book about working with obsessional jealousy in relationships, and another about emotional stability. He regularly contributes to newspapers and magazine publications.
Latest posts
Abandonment Issues & Relationships
Abandoned, lost property, All of the lost unclaimed things. Do you fear that you might be discarded, lost and left behind? Abandoned children and animals are very vulnerable. Abandonment threatens our security. As adults we may be less vulnerable now, but if you … Read more
Internal Working Model
What do we mean by an internal working model? In this blog I am looking in particular at John Bowlby’s (1907-90) internal working model. I will consider the work of other psychoanalysts as well. John Bowlby was a psychoanalyst and developer of … Read more
Absent Fathers and Attachment Issues
Children who grow up without fathers may develop a particular sense of insecurity. This may become noticeable and effect both their self-worth, and their capacity to develop healthy mature psychological relationships. How are men who grew up without fathers expected … Read more
Retroactive Jealousy: How to Manage it
Retroactive jealousy refers to an issue people have when they become fixated on their partner’s romantic and sexual past. Retroactive jealousy is an obsessive problem and can be understood as sitting under the umbrella of obsessive-compulsive disorders (RJ/OCD). I have … Read more
Toxic relationships
A toxic relationship is a relationship in which one partner shows signs of controlling, manipulative, or abusive behaviours. The lasting effects of a toxic relationship can be devastating. Toxic relationships develop over time. The changes may be gradual and subtle … Read more
Emotional Permanence
Emotional permanence refers to our capacity to believe in the feelings of other people even when we are not with them. For example, to know that your partner loves you even when you are not together. For some of us, … Read more







